Russia retaliates against U.S. in hacking crisis

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MOSCOW (RPN) – The president of the Russian Federation today struck back at the United States’ expulsion of 35 suspected spies by jamming all reruns and downloads of Dancing with the Stars, the popular American show.

The show’s YouTube and Facebook accounts also disappeared from the Internet.

“You think Vlady not know how to really hurt Obama? I predict rioting in streets!” Russian President Vladimir Putin said in announcing the actions, which came as tensions surrounding the Russian hacking of the American presidential election continued to rise.

Donald Trump, decisively elected by Putin, expressed his first public disagreement with the Russian leader, who recently said he would move to Trump Tower until the Lincoln Bedroom has been redecorated to his tastes. Putin previously said he would never stay there, but has recently warmed to the idea.

Donald Trump: "I Will Move To Canada If I Win Presidency"

“Not smart,” Trump said of Putin’s actions against Dancing with the Stars. “Huge disappointment. Except for The Apprentice, there is no better show.”

Former Texas governor Rick Perry, named by Trump to be the next Energy Secretary and a former contestant on Dancing with the Stars, agreed, even if he could not remember the show’s name when asked by reporters about his favorite programs.

“I would never do away with Teen Mom, The Bachelor and — let’s see — I can’t remember the other one,” Perry said. “The third one, I can’t. Sorry. Oops.”

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