High School Senior Weighing Offers From 8 Fast Food Franchises


CHARLESTON, SC – With graduation just weeks away, high school seniors across the country are anxiously searching for summer jobs. All except for Amber Denton, who is considering offers from eight of the top fast food franchises in the world. She has her pick of McDonald’s, Burger King, Subway, Taco Bell, KFC, Krispy Kreme, Baskin-Robbins or Papa John’s, where she’ll be working up to 35 hours a week at slightly more than minimum wage.

Denton,18, credits her success to sacrifice and hard work. While her classmates were taking selfies and talking about the latest episode of Game of Thrones, she was working as a waitress at Muddy Waters Coffee Bar. At the end of her sophomore year, she was tapped to work at regional supermarket chain Food Lion. “I started as a cashier, then eventually went to work at the bakery, and then the deli counter,” she said. “It was a much better education than the one I was getting at school.”

Finally, Denton’s tolerance for subpar sanitary conditions, working on holidays and a 1% yearly raise caught the attention of fast food recruiters. “A customer who managed a Burger King complimented me on my halfhearted smile and the look of quiet defeat in my eyes,” she recalled. “He said I was perfect for the fast food industry and handed me his card.” Mildly encouraged by this chance meeting, Denton began traveling up to 20 miles from her home to apply at different franchises. Soon after, the offers began rolling in.

Denton plans to skip college in order to pursue a career in fast food, a decision fully supported by her parents. “In today’s economy you need a PhD just to get a job as a janitor at an investment bank,” said Denton’s father, Paul. “My daughter will be making money while her friends are racking up student debt, and in four years guess who’s going to be asking who for a job? You don’t have to be a high school graduate to figure that one out.”

Want to see more from DanaSan? Check out her website at danasansbrainstew.com

© Absrd Comedy, LLC – a parody site for entertainment purposes only. Laugh. Enjoy! Individual opinions expressed are those of the individual authors, not necessarily of absrdComedy, and may not even be those of the individual authors.

Comments are closed.