18 Skymall Products You Didn’t Know You Needed

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13. Watch Cabinet

So many watches, so little time.

So many watches, so little time.

What time is it? Time to NOT get another watch because seriously who has 22 watches? If you’re a rich asshole, then this product has your name all over it. Complete with 22 ultra soft felt-covered slots with finely detailed little pillows, so your watches can be comfortable. It also comes in a smaller version, for you peasants who only have 16 watches.


14. Tikker

Watch Your Life Pass You By.

Watch Your Life Pass You By.

Speaking of time, do you know how much you have left? This watch does! Finally, wrist watches that actually make you want to slit them. By using statistics and a personal health algorithm, this watch calculates your life expectancy and counts down your life from years to seconds. Is it a complete waste of $79.99? Yes! But you’re wasting time questioning it. Just ORDER. The clock is ticking!


15. Slimming Muscle Tank

For when your body is just TOO good.

For when your body is just TOO good.

I know, it’s every man’s worst nightmare to walk into a room and have everyone stare at his impeccibly chiseled physique. That’s why Sky Mall has this Slimming Muscle Tank, so you don’t have to be embarrassed by that six-pack anymore. Oh wait. Guys, I don’t think this product is actually made for men who look like the model in the catalogue. Okay, I think I get it now…

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These are real Skymall products – you should totally go buy them.

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