10. Super Weiner Garden SculptureThis is the only thing in the catalogue that I actually contemplated. The only problem is that I don’t have a garden. Otherwise, it would have been a done deal.
11. 16th Century Replica Italian Armor StatueThis six-foot tall full-sized suit of armor on a Medieval museum mount is a must have for…no one. Sure, it’s almost $1000 which is more than a full-month’s rent, but answer me this, when your landlord knocks on your door demanding rent money, and a fucking KNIGHT answers, let’s just say he won’t be bothering you any more. The real price of this product is actually $995 plus $99 in parentheses. Seriously. The catalogue reads $995 (+99*) which I’ve never seen before and is so brilliantly stupid.
12. Cat Lady Handheld MirrorIf you’re a cat lady, chances are you spend a lot of time looking at yourself in the mirror. Now, you can stare loneliness in the face with this cat lady mirror for only $20. But only if you call MEOW.
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These are real Skymall products – you should totally go buy them.