The Cave Times: Tickling is Invented, To Mixed Reviews


NEANDERVILLE – A potentially unbreachable rift developed today during a meeting of The Assembly when Dwellers nearly came to blows over the true purpose and meaning of tickling, which only yesterday was introduced into the human experience by Tribe jester Griff.

Griff found it hugely amusing when, suddenly struck by inspiration, he playfully ran his fingers along the underarms of his young son, who responded at first with amazement, and then with incessant giggling, and then with crying. He achieved the same result with the bottoms of his son’s feet, but not his shoulders, knees or elbows.

“About what I expected!” Griff said. He immediately proclaimed himself the inventor of tickling, a claim no one disputed.

Those who witnessed the tickling reacted in markedly different fashion.

Tickling Is Invented

Tickling Is Invented

“Just like the first clown,” said Tribe shrink Sig. “Amusing on the surface, entertaining to the uninformed, but dig down into the psyche a bit and one can see the beginnings of a lifelong neurosis. Tickling is a travesty.”

Griff’s friend Griff, who likes everything Griff does, agreed with Griff that tickling was “healthy and fun, with the crying a beneficial release of pent-up emotion.” Griff added: “Tickling has a future, and not just with kids.” His friend Griff wholeheartedly agreed.

These divergent viewpoints led to a four-hour shouting match at the Assembly meeting, despite President Vlad’s best efforts to bring the sides together. Not even his observation that “you’re acting like a bunch of big babies, just like Congress,” could shame Dwellers into a calm and rational discussion.

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